Resources for Dealing with
High Conflict People

Books & Products

uhb

All of our books, CDs and DVDs can be ordered through UnHooked Books.  The "order now" links below will take you to the secure website to place your order. You can enjoy the convenience of reading many of these titles on your eBook reader. Don't miss our Video Training options too! Our products give you tips for dealing with high conflict people in divorce, workplace, healthcare, higher education, government agencies, volunteer organizations, your neighborhood, and even your family.

Featured Product of the Month
trump

Trump Bubbles: The Dramatic Rise and Fall of High-Conflict Politicians is the first book to really explain the rise and fall of Donald Trump, candidate for President of the United States of America. What’s a trump bubble? It’s when emotions trump thinking in politics. When fear trumps facts. When leader love trumps logic. Donald Trump is the most recent trump bubble, but trump bubbles have occurred before and will again.

Remember the dot.com bust of 2000? The housing and stock market bubbles that burst in 2008? They were held up by “irrational exuberance." Now there’s the Donald Trump Bubble. People love him or hate him or are totally confused. However, he is quite predictable, if you understand high-conflict personalities. Trump Bubbles explains the rise-and-fall pattern of high-conflict politicians, focusing on the case of Donald Trump and the questions people ask.

order now

Products by Topic
Family Law
splitting130

SPLITTING: Protecting Yourself While Divorcing Someone with a Borderline or Narcissistic Personality Disorder
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq. and Randi Kreger, co-author of Stop Walking on Eggshells

This book is designed for anyone going through a potentially high conflict divorce, as well as their attorneys, therapists and/or family members. It focuses on common emotional and legal issues raised when someone with a Borderline or Narcissistic personality enters the Family Court system. This is an honest and supportive book, with practical suggestions for handling the many predictable issues of legal manipulations, abusive behavior, false allegations of abusive behavior, finding an attorney, and a prolonged legal process. Note: A companion CD for this book is also available.

order now

divorcemed130

Is Divorce Mediation For You? (DVD)
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.

This 1-hour nutshell video is a dramatization of issues and controversies from real cases that shows how a neutral mediator guides a controlled process and provides information. The parties raise issues, ask questions of the mediator and each other, make proposals and the final decisions. Disagreements, anger, surprise events, tears and significant progress are all highlighted. If you are deciding whether to use mediation or not, this video will help you decide. It covers the most informed way, at the least expense, to get divorced; would I do better in mediation or in court; the basic standards on parenting plans, child support, spousal support and property division (based on California law, although other states are often similar); how substance abuse, restraining orders, child alienation and other problems are addressed; how divorce mediation works. This dramatization of issues and controversies from real cases shows how a neutral mediator guides a controlled process and provides information. The parties raise issues, ask questions of the mediator and each other, make proposals and the final decisions. Disagreements, anger, surprise events, tears and significant progress are all highlighted.

order now

alienate130

Don't Alienate The Kids! Raising Resilient Children While Avoiding High Conflict Divorce
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, JD

Don’t Alienate the Kids! is a fresh examination of the child alienation problem from the perspective of a lawyer, therapist, mediator. Bill doesn’t just analyze the Parental Alienation Syndrome vs. Child Abuse Presumption debate; he also proposes his own theory based on recent breakthroughs in brain research about how children learn.   In his theory, there are no bad parents, just bad behaviors – the behaviors of both parents, family members, friends and divorce professionals. Most of these bad behaviors go unrecognized in daily life, but they help build a Wall of Alienation between a parent and child. By becoming aware and using his tips, we can all help children build a Foundation of Resilience which will last them a lifetime. This is a book for any parent even considering a divorce, and for any professional who wants to truly help parents raise resilient children.

order now

hcp130

High Conflict People in Legal Disputes (2nd Edition)
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.

Using over two dozen compelling case examples, Bill Eddy explains the dynamics and strange logic of four types of Personality Disorders that appear in legal disputes. Everybody knows someone with a High Conflict Personality (HCP). “How can he be so unreasonable? So totally rigid and self-centered?” “Why does she keep fighting so much? Can’t she see how destructive she is?” “Can you believe they’re going to court over ______?” (You fill in the issue).  This book helps make sense of the fears that drive conflict and drive people to file lawsuits, complaints and wreak havoc for legal professionals and the general public alike. Bill Eddy explores the characteristics of Borderline Personality Disorder, Narcissistic Personality Disorder, Histrionic Personality Disorder and Antisocial Personality Disorder. Chart included.

order now

managinghcps130

Managing High Conflict People in Court
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.

This book describes general principles and suggestions for judicial officers to use in managing people with High-Conflict Personalities in any courtroom, with an emphasis on family court litigants. As explained in this informative book, approximately half of these cases appear to involve two or more parties who are HCPs, while the other half may be driven primarily by one HCP with the other party generally acting reasonably. As litigants, they have a familiar pattern of high-intensity emotions, distortions of information, and self-defeating behavior. Their prolonged disputes are characterized by unchanging hostility, replacement of resolved issues with new unresolved issues, and lack of insight and behavior change.
order now

proposal130

So, What’s Your Proposal? Shifting High-Conflict People from Blaming to Problem-Solving in 30 Seconds
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.

Blame abounds! People confront us at work, the store, and online. Nerves get on edge. We get stuck blaming others for anything that goes wrong. With high-conflict people increasing in society, a twenty-four-hour news cycle, and social media, we hear constantly about the worst behavior. The temptation is to react and blame. So, What’s Your Proposal? shifts the conversation from the past and blame to the future and problem-solving. It teaches a simple technique that helps the reader stay calm and confident, while keeping the focus on solving problems. The reader will earn respect-many times in just thirty seconds.

order now

BIFF130

BIFF: Quick Responses to High-Conflict People, Their Personal Attacks, Hostile Email and Social Media Meltdowns (Second Edition)
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.

This is Bill Eddy’s new Second Edition of BIFF. It includes an all-new chapter on “Coaching for BIFF Responses”. BIFF helps us communicate in this age of rapid change and instant communication, and in a society with a growing Culture of Blame and Disrespect. Managing your responses to high-conflict emails, texts, letters, and social media meltdowns is imperative.  A BIFF Response can be applied in any communication anywhere – online, social media, in a letter or even in person. It can be used at work, earning you respect and success. It can help you get along with difficult family members, friends, neighbors and others anywhere in your life. BIFF was designed to protect you and your reputation by responding quickly and civilly to people who treat you rudely, while being reasonable in return. BIFF stands for Brief, Informative, Friendly, and Firm. A BIFF response is easy to remember, but hard to do. It takes practice! This book gives over 20 examples of BIFF responses for all areas of life—plus more tips to help you deal with high-conflict people anywhere.

order now

biffresponse

How To Write A BIFF Response (DVD)
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.

Sick and tired of hostile emails? Personal attacks? Social media meltdowns? This 20-minute video teaches a simple, but powerful method of writing responses that are Brief Informative Friendly Firm.   These are called “BIFF Responses” and make YOU look good! It takes practice, but almost anyone can do it. Learn how to write short BIFF responses with this video, including examples for relationships; divorce conflicts; at work as an employess; at work as a manager.

order now

coachbiff130

Coaching For BIFF Responses (DVD)
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.

Coaching for BIFF Responses is a 50-minute video that teaches a 10-question model for coaching anyone to write responses that are Brief, Informative, Friendly and Firm (“BIFF Responses”). High Conflict Institute has taught the BIFF method for over six years and it is changing the conversation in divorce cases, in the workplace, between neighbors and among family members.  This video includes videotape examples of coaching everyday people to use the BIFF method. It’s not as easy as it looks! This training session should help you improve your BIFF skills and your coaching skills. For anyone working with people: lawyers, counselors, teachers, managers, healthcare workers, administrators, government officials – or anyone!

order now

future130

The Future of Family Court: Structure, Skills and Less Stress
By Bill Eddy, LCSW

The Future of Family Court is designed for judicial officers with an emphasis on applying lessons learned from the field of mental health to the family court system, especially when working with parents with personality disorders or traits. Written from Bill Eddy’s perspective as a family lawyer and mental health professional, and as a trainer of judges in managing high-conflict people in court, he provides tips on what individual judges can do, rather than recommending sweeping changes in the court system or creating new players in the decision-making process.  Judges who apply the principles described should feel a much better sense of control over their courtrooms and less stress.

order now

splittingsm

The Splitting CD
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.

This CD contains interviews of Bill Eddy and Randi Kreger, co-authors of the book Splitting: Protecting Yourself While Divorcing Someone with Borderline or Narcissistic Personality Disorder. Bill and Randi expand on the topics in Splitting, tackle some new ones, and answer frequently asked questions.

order now

billeddy

Working With High Conflict Clients: Ethics & Risk Management
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.

This 6-hour seminar was presented to over 350 counselors in Pennsylvania, but can be useful for anyone dealing with potentially high conflict clients or helping their clients deal with a high conflict person in their lives. The training includes: five common personality patterns of high-conflict behavior; recent brain research in managing high-conflict clients; how to avoid boundary violations with high-conflict clients; four-step method of working with high-conflict clients; how to manage confidentiality issues and duties to warn others of risks; risks & opportunities of new roles in conflict settings; professional standards of care to avoid malpractice risks; and how to avoid burn-out and negativity while working with high-conflict clients. Home study test provided if you wish to take the home study test for 6 CE credits. Available in DVD and CD Versions.

order now

dealing

Dealing with High Conflict People in Divorce & Co-Parenting (13-session set)

For separating or divorcing parents, and for professionals who want to know more about the most important issues that parents deal with in high-conflict divorce and separation, and co-parenting with a high-conflict parent. In this audio CD series, Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq., President of the High Conflict Institute, discusses 13 of the most important issues that parents deal with in high-conflict divorce, separation and when co-parenting with a high-conflict parent. Based on the “High-Conflict Personality” theory developed by Bill Eddy, they discuss the 5 personality disorders that drive high-conflict people, including Borderline Personality Disorder, Narcissistic Personality Disorder, Paranoid Personality Disorder, Histrionic Personality Disorder, and Antisocial Personality Disorder.

These audio CDs help you understand what’s going on in the High Conflict person’s mind and how to manage the relationship during and after the divorce or separation and as a co-parent. We teach you how to do the opposite of what you’re used to doing and what you “feel” like doing – a must when dealing with a high-conflict person. Financial info (child support & asset division) is included, along with info for grandparents.

This series is for parents, grandparents and other family members and focuses on issues that arise in high-conflict separation, divorce, child custody and co-parenting disputes, and helps you with on-going relationship management with a high-conflict co-parent and with your children.

Topics include:
Session 1 – High Conflict Separation & Divorce Basics
Session 2 – Managing Your Case When You Don’t Have an Attorney
Session 3 – Educating the Court about High-Conflict Personalities
Session 4 – How to Handle False Accusations
Session 5 – How to Help My Child if I Am Concerned or a Court Has Determined that He/She Has Been Abused
Session 6 – Managing Your Relationship with a High-Conflict Co-Parent
Session 7 – Managing Relationships with Your Children During & After a High-Conflict Divorce or Separation
Session 8 – Should I Request a Custody Evaluation?
Session 9 – Types of Custody & Access (Visitation/Parenting Time) Arrangements, and Requesting Supervised Visits
Session 10 – For Grandparents: Having & Managing Relationships with an Adult Child and Grandchildren When the Other Parent is High-Conflict
Session 11 – Preventing Your Child from Developing High-Conflict Behaviors from the Other Parent’s Influence
Session 12 – When to go to Court and When to Handle It Yourself
Session 13 – Best Use of Parent Coordinators, and Educating Parent Coordinators About High-Conflict Personalities

order now

dealing

Dealing with High Conflict People in Divorce (Without Children)

For separating or divorcing couples without children. In this audio CD series, Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq., President of the High Conflict Institute, discusses 4 of the most important issues that divorcing couples deal with in high-conflict divorce or separation. Based on the “High-Conflict Personality” theory developed by Bill Eddy, he discusses the 5 personality disorders that drive high-conflict people, including Borderline Personality Disorder, Narcissistic Personality Disorder, Paranoid Personality Disorder, Histrionic Personality Disorder, and Antisocial Personality Disorder.

These audio CDs help you understand what’s going on in the High Conflict person’s mind and how to manage the relationship during and after the divorce or separation. Learn how to do the opposite of what you’re used to doing and what you “feel” like doing – a must when dealing with a high-conflict person.

Topics include:
Session 1 – High Conflict Separation & Divorce Basics
Session 2 – Managing Your Case When You Don’t Have an Attorney
Session 3 – Educating the Court About High-Conflict Personalities
Session 4 – When to go to Court and When to Handle It Yourself

order now

bait & Switch

Bait & Switch - Saving Your Relationship After Incredible Romance Turns Into Exhausting Chaos
By Megan Hunter

Has your fairytale romance suddenly transformed into relationship chaos? Are you bewildered with how the person of your dreams has morphed into someone you barely recognize--displaying hostile, unpredictable behavior that leaves you exhausted and confused? If your relationship has deteriorated into one high-conflict scenario after another, and you're trying to decide whether you should dig deep and try to make it work or cut your losses and exit safely, this straight-talking book has the answers you need.

order now

nwlogo130

New Ways For Families Products

Please visit the The New Ways For Families website to view the entire family of books, workbooks, CDs and DVDs available for purchase.

Divorce and Co-Parenting
splitting130

SPLITTING: Protecting Yourself While Divorcing Someone with a Borderline or Narcissistic Personality Disorder
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq. and Randi Kreger, co-author of Stop Walking on Eggshells

This book is designed for anyone going through a potentially high conflict divorce, as well as their attorneys, therapists and/or family members. It focuses on common emotional and legal issues raised when someone with a Borderline or Narcissistic personality enters the Family Court system. This is an honest and supportive book, with practical suggestions for handling the many predictable issues of legal manipulations, abusive behavior, false allegations of abusive behavior, finding an attorney, and a prolonged legal process. Note: A companion CD for this book is also available.

order now

divorcemed130

Is Divorce Mediation For You? (DVD)
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.

This 1-hour nutshell video is a dramatization of issues and controversies from real cases that shows how a neutral mediator guides a controlled process and provides information. The parties raise issues, ask questions of the mediator and each other, make proposals and the final decisions. Disagreements, anger, surprise events, tears and significant progress are all highlighted. If you are deciding whether to use mediation or not, this video will help you decide. It covers the most informed way, at the least expense, to get divorced; would I do better in mediation or in court; the basic standards on parenting plans, child support, spousal support and property division (based on California law, although other states are often similar); how substance abuse, restraining orders, child alienation and other problems are addressed; how divorce mediation works. This dramatization of issues and controversies from real cases shows how a neutral mediator guides a controlled process and provides information. The parties raise issues, ask questions of the mediator and each other, make proposals and the final decisions. Disagreements, anger, surprise events, tears and significant progress are all highlighted.

order now

alienate130

Don't Alienate The Kids! Raising Resilient Children While Avoiding High Conflict Divorce
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, JD

Don’t Alienate the Kids! is a fresh examination of the child alienation problem from the perspective of a lawyer, therapist, mediator. Bill doesn’t just analyze the Parental Alienation Syndrome vs. Child Abuse Presumption debate; he also proposes his own theory based on recent breakthroughs in brain research about how children learn.   In his theory, there are no bad parents, just bad behaviors – the behaviors of both parents, family members, friends and divorce professionals. Most of these bad behaviors go unrecognized in daily life, but they help build a Wall of Alienation between a parent and child. By becoming aware and using his tips, we can all help children build a Foundation of Resilience which will last them a lifetime. This is a book for any parent even considering a divorce, and for any professional who wants to truly help parents raise resilient children.

order now

BIFF130

BIFF: Quick Responses to High-Conflict People, Their Personal Attacks, Hostile Email and Social Media Meltdowns(Second Edition)
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.

This is Bill Eddy’s new Second Edition of BIFF. It includes an all-new chapter on “Coaching for BIFF Responses”. BIFF helps us communicate in this age of rapid change and instant communication, and in a society with a growing Culture of Blame and Disrespect. Managing your responses to high-conflict emails, texts, letters, and social media meltdowns is imperative.  A BIFF Response can be applied in any communication anywhere – online, social media, in a letter or even in person. It can be used at work, earning you respect and success. It can help you get along with difficult family members, friends, neighbors and others anywhere in your life. BIFF was designed to protect you and your reputation by responding quickly and civilly to people who treat you rudely, while being reasonable in return. BIFF stands for Brief, Informative, Friendly, and Firm. A BIFF response is easy to remember, but hard to do. It takes practice! This book gives over 20 examples of BIFF responses for all areas of life—plus more tips to help you deal with high-conflict people anywhere.

order now

biffresponse

How To Write A BIFF Response (DVD)
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.

Sick and tired of hostile emails? Personal attacks? Social media meltdowns? This 20-minute video teaches a simple, but powerful method of writing responses that are Brief Informative Friendly Firm.   These are called “BIFF Responses” and make YOU look good! It takes practice, but almost anyone can do it. Learn how to write short BIFF responses with this video, including examples for relationships; divorce conflicts; at work as an employess; at work as a manager.

order now

coachbiff130

Coaching For BIFF Responses (DVD)
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.

Coaching for BIFF Responses is a 50-minute video that teaches a 10-question model for coaching anyone to write responses that are Brief, Informative, Friendly and Firm (“BIFF Responses”). High Conflict Institute has taught the BIFF method for over six years and it is changing the conversation in divorce cases, in the workplace, between neighbors and among family members.  This video includes videotape examples of coaching everyday people to use the BIFF method. It’s not as easy as it looks! This training session should help you improve your BIFF skills and your coaching skills. For anyone working with people: lawyers, counselors, teachers, managers, healthcare workers, administrators, government officials – or anyone!

order now

proposal130

So, What’s Your Proposal? Shifting High-Conflict People from Blaming to Problem-Solving in 30 Seconds
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.

 Blame abounds! People confront us at work, the store, and online. Nerves get on edge. We get stuck blaming others for anything that goes wrong. With high-conflict people increasing in society, a twenty-four-hour news cycle, and social media, we hear constantly about the worst behavior. The temptation is to react and blame. So, What’s Your Proposal? shifts the conversation from the past and blame to the future and problem-solving. It teaches a simple technique that helps the reader stay calm and confident, while keeping the focus on solving problems. The reader will earn respect-many times in just thirty seconds.

order now

splittingsm

The Splitting CD
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.

This CD contains interviews of Bill Eddy and Randi Kreger, co-authors of the book Splitting: Protecting Yourself While Divorcing Someone with Borderline or Narcissistic Personality Disorder. Bill and Randi expand on the topics in Splitting, tackle some new ones, and answer frequently asked questions.

order now

future130

The Future of Family Court: Structure, Skills and Less Stress
By Bill Eddy, LCSW

The Future of Family Court is designed for judicial officers with an emphasis on applying lessons learned from the field of mental health to the family court system, especially when working with parents with personality disorders or traits. Written from Bill Eddy’s perspective as a family lawyer and mental health professional, and as a trainer of judges in managing high-conflict people in court, he provides tips on what individual judges can do, rather than recommending sweeping changes in the court system or creating new players in the decision-making process.  Judges who apply the principles described should feel a much better sense of control over their courtrooms and less stress.

order now

dealing

Dealing with High Conflict People in Divorce & Co-Parenting (13-session set)

For separating or divorcing parents, and for professionals who want to know more about the most important issues that parents deal with in high-conflict divorce and separation, and co-parenting with a high-conflict parent. In this audio CD series, Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq., President of the High Conflict Institute, discusses 13 of the most important issues that parents deal with in high-conflict divorce, separation and when co-parenting with a high-conflict parent. Based on the “High-Conflict Personality” theory developed by Bill Eddy, they discuss the 5 personality disorders that drive high-conflict people, including Borderline Personality Disorder, Narcissistic Personality Disorder, Paranoid Personality Disorder, Histrionic Personality Disorder, and Antisocial Personality Disorder.

These audio CDs help you understand what’s going on in the High Conflict person’s mind and how to manage the relationship during and after the divorce or separation and as a co-parent. We teach you how to do the opposite of what you’re used to doing and what you “feel” like doing – a must when dealing with a high-conflict person. Financial info (child support & asset division) is included, along with info for grandparents.

This series is for parents, grandparents and other family members and focuses on issues that arise in high-conflict separation, divorce, child custody and co-parenting disputes, and helps you with on-going relationship management with a high-conflict co-parent and with your children.

Topics include:
Session 1 – High Conflict Separation & Divorce Basics
Session 2 – Managing Your Case When You Don’t Have an Attorney
Session 3 – Educating the Court about High-Conflict Personalities
Session 4 – How to Handle False Accusations
Session 5 – How to Help My Child if I Am Concerned or a Court Has Determined that He/She Has Been Abused
Session 6 – Managing Your Relationship with a High-Conflict Co-Parent
Session 7 – Managing Relationships with Your Children During & After a High-Conflict Divorce or Separation
Session 8 – Should I Request a Custody Evaluation?
Session 9 – Types of Custody & Access (Visitation/Parenting Time) Arrangements, and Requesting Supervised Visits
Session 10 – For Grandparents: Having & Managing Relationships with an Adult Child and Grandchildren When the Other Parent is High-Conflict
Session 11 – Preventing Your Child from Developing High-Conflict Behaviors from the Other Parent’s Influence
Session 12 – When to go to Court and When to Handle It Yourself
Session 13 – Best Use of Parent Coordinators, and Educating Parent Coordinators About High-Conflict Personalities

order now

dealing

Dealing with High Conflict People in Divorce (Without Children)

For separating or divorcing couples without children. In this audio CD series, Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq., President of the High Conflict Institute, discusses 4 of the most important issues that divorcing couples deal with in high-conflict divorce or separation. Based on the “High-Conflict Personality” theory developed by Bill Eddy, he discusses the 5 personality disorders that drive high-conflict people, including Borderline Personality Disorder, Narcissistic Personality Disorder, Paranoid Personality Disorder, Histrionic Personality Disorder, and Antisocial Personality Disorder.

These audio CDs help you understand what’s going on in the High Conflict person’s mind and how to manage the relationship during and after the divorce or separation. Learn how to do the opposite of what you’re used to doing and what you “feel” like doing – a must when dealing with a high-conflict person.

Topics include:
Session 1 – High Conflict Separation & Divorce Basics
Session 2 – Managing Your Case When You Don’t Have an Attorney
Session 3 – Educating the Court About High-Conflict Personalities
Session 4 – When to go to Court and When to Handle It Yourself

order now

bait & Switch

Bait & Switch - Saving Your Relationship After Incredible Romance Turns Into Exhausting Chaos
By Megan Hunter

Has your fairytale romance suddenly transformed into relationship chaos? Are you bewildered with how the person of your dreams has morphed into someone you barely recognize--displaying hostile, unpredictable behavior that leaves you exhausted and confused? If your relationship has deteriorated into one high-conflict scenario after another, and you're trying to decide whether you should dig deep and try to make it work or cut your losses and exit safely, this straight-talking book has the answers you need.

order now

nwlogo130

New Ways For Families Products

Please visit the The New Ways For Families website to view the entire family of books, workbooks, CDs and DVDs available for purchase.

New Ways for Families
nwlogo130

New Ways For Families Products

Please visit the The New Ways For Families website to view the entire family of books, workbooks, CDs and DVDs available for purchase.

New Ways Provider Licensing Fee

For approved providers only. This annual licensing fee gives approved providers permission to use the name, method and materials with clients. This licensing fee is for the calendar year. A prerequisite for licensing is a training by High Conflict Institute in the New Ways for Families method. If you have not yet been trained, you must complete a training before purchasing the licensing package. For more information, review our training & licensing procedure here, or contact us.

PayPal Acceptance Mark

 

 


New Ways Provider Licensing Fee - Individual Annual License - $25

New Ways Provider Licensing Fee - Agency Annual License - $100

Mediation
proposal130

So, What’s Your Proposal? Shifting High-Conflict People from Blaming to Problem-Solving in 30 Seconds
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.

Blame abounds! People confront us at work, the store, and online. Nerves get on edge. We get stuck blaming others for anything that goes wrong. With high-conflict people increasing in society, a twenty-four-hour news cycle, and social media, we hear constantly about the worst behavior. The temptation is to react and blame. So, What’s Your Proposal? shifts the conversation from the past and blame to the future and problem-solving. It teaches a simple technique that helps the reader stay calm and confident, while keeping the focus on solving problems. The reader will earn respect-many times in just thirty seconds.

order now

divorcemed130

Is Divorce Mediation For You? (DVD)
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.

This 1-hour nutshell video is a dramatization of issues and controversies from real cases that shows how a neutral mediator guides a controlled process and provides information. The parties raise issues, ask questions of the mediator and each other, make proposals and the final decisions. Disagreements, anger, surprise events, tears and significant progress are all highlighted. If you are deciding whether to use mediation or not, this video will help you decide. It covers the most informed way, at the least expense, to get divorced; would I do better in mediation or in court; the basic standards on parenting plans, child support, spousal support and property division (based on California law, although other states are often similar); how substance abuse, restraining orders, child alienation and other problems are addressed; how divorce mediation works. This dramatization of issues and controversies from real cases shows how a neutral mediator guides a controlled process and provides information. The parties raise issues, ask questions of the mediator and each other, make proposals and the final decisions. Disagreements, anger, surprise events, tears and significant progress are all highlighted.

order now

hcp130

High Conflict People in Legal Disputes (2nd Edition)
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.

Using over two dozen compelling case examples, Bill Eddy explains the dynamics and strange logic of four types of Personality Disorders that appear in legal disputes. Everybody knows someone with a High Conflict Personality (HCP). “How can he be so unreasonable? So totally rigid and self-centered?” “Why does she keep fighting so much? Can’t she see how destructive she is?” “Can you believe they’re going to court over ______?” (You fill in the issue).  This book helps make sense of the fears that drive conflict and drive people to file lawsuits, complaints and wreak havoc for legal professionals and the general public alike. Bill Eddy explores the characteristics of Borderline Personality Disorder, Narcissistic Personality Disorder, Histrionic Personality Disorder and Antisocial Personality Disorder. Chart included.

order now

 

New Ways for Mediation (Video Training Online) 75 minute seminar with 3 hour demonstration
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.

Potentially high-conflict cases benefit from a more tightly-structured and controlled mediation process. This approach emphasizes the role of the mediator as “guide” – much more directive about the process and much less directive about the actual decisions the parties should make. The mediator provides a few simple skills for the parties to repeatedly apply in more actively asking questions, gathering information and making proposals, while the mediator more actively provides education and options for the parties to consider. Storytelling about past behavior is stopped and discussions of emotional issues are firmly discouraged, based on the belief that these issues are irresolvable for people with potentially high-conflict personalities and simply reinforce their intransigence. However, throughout this process, the mediator demonstrates empathy, respect and neutrality for both parties, despite angry outbursts, surprise events, tears and rigid positions. The intended result is that the parties have less need to defend themselves, work harder at finding solutions, and are more committed to their own decisions.

order now

 

New Ways for Mediation (Video Training Online) 75 minute seminar
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.

Potentially high-conflict cases benefit from a more tightly-structured and controlled mediation process. This approach emphasizes the role of the mediator as “guide” – much more directive about the process and much less directive about the actual decisions the parties should make. The mediator provides a few simple skills for the parties to repeatedly apply in more actively asking questions, gathering information and making proposals, while the mediator more actively provides education and options for the parties to consider. Storytelling about past behavior is stopped and discussions of emotional issues are firmly discouraged, based on the belief that these issues are irresolvable for people with potentially high-conflict personalities and simply reinforce their intransigence. However, throughout this process, the mediator demonstrates empathy, respect and neutrality for both parties, despite angry outbursts, surprise events, tears and rigid positions. The intended result is that the parties have less need to defend themselves, work harder at finding solutions, and are more committed to their own decisions.

order now

meddvd

Managing High Conflict People in Mediation (DVD)
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.

High-conflict people appear to be increasing in society and in mediation. They often have intense negative emotions, make repeated personal attacks, trigger splits in communities, organizations and families. They frequently work against their own self-interest and seem to have little apparent desire to resolve the issues at hand. This 2-hour seminar provides information about the predictable patterns of five common types of high-conflict people, including case examples. Ten Tips are provided for mediators to use in managing their disputes, which are respectful, calming of their negative emotions, and focus on tasks and setting limits. Bill Eddy livens this presentation with humor, surprising insights and dozens of practical suggestions for mediators to use in any conflict involving one or more high-conflict people.

order now

BIFF130

BIFF: Quick Responses to High Conflict People, Their Personal Attacks, Hostile Email and Social Media Meltdowns (Second Edition)
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.

This is Bill Eddy’s new Second Edition of BIFF. It includes an all-new chapter on “Coaching for BIFF Responses”. BIFF helps us communicate in this age of rapid change and instant communication, and in a society with a growing Culture of Blame and Disrespect. Managing your responses to high-conflict emails, texts, letters, and social media meltdowns is imperative.  A BIFF Response can be applied in any communication anywhere – online, social media, in a letter or even in person. It can be used at work, earning you respect and success. It can help you get along with difficult family members, friends, neighbors and others anywhere in your life. BIFF was designed to protect you and your reputation by responding quickly and civilly to people who treat you rudely, while being reasonable in return. BIFF stands for Brief, Informative, Friendly, and Firm. A BIFF response is easy to remember, but hard to do. It takes practice! This book gives over 20 examples of BIFF responses for all areas of life—plus more tips to help you deal with high-conflict people anywhere.

order now

biffresponse

How To Write A BIFF Response (DVD)
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.

Sick and tired of hostile emails? Personal attacks? Social media meltdowns? This 20-minute video teaches a simple, but powerful method of writing responses that are Brief Informative Friendly Firm.   These are called “BIFF Responses” and make YOU look good! It takes practice, but almost anyone can do it. Learn how to write short BIFF responses with this video, including examples for relationships; divorce conflicts; at work as an employess; at work as a manager.

order now

coachbiff130

Coaching For BIFF Responses (DVD)
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.

Coaching for BIFF Responses is a 50-minute video that teaches a 10-question model for coaching anyone to write responses that are Brief, Informative, Friendly and Firm (“BIFF Responses”). High Conflict Institute has taught the BIFF method for over six years and it is changing the conversation in divorce cases, in the workplace, between neighbors and among family members.  This video includes videotape examples of coaching everyday people to use the BIFF method. It’s not as easy as it looks! This training session should help you improve your BIFF skills and your coaching skills. For anyone working with people: lawyers, counselors, teachers, managers, healthcare workers, administrators, government officials – or anyone!

order now

managinghcps130

Managing High Conflict People in Court
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.

This book describes general principles and suggestions for judicial officers to use in managing people with High-Conflict Personalities in any courtroom, with an emphasis on family court litigants. As explained in this informative book, approximately half of these cases appear to involve two or more parties who are HCPs, while the other half may be driven primarily by one HCP with the other party generally acting reasonably. As litigants, they have a familiar pattern of high-intensity emotions, distortions of information, and self-defeating behavior. Their prolonged disputes are characterized by unchanging hostility, replacement of resolved issues with new unresolved issues, and lack of insight and behavior change.order now

alienate130

Don't Alienate The Kids! Raising Resilient Children While Avoiding High Conflict Divorce
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, JD

Don’t Alienate the Kids! is a fresh examination of the child alienation problem from the perspective of a lawyer, therapist, mediator. Bill doesn’t just analyze the Parental Alienation Syndrome vs. Child Abuse Presumption debate; he also proposes his own theory based on recent breakthroughs in brain research about how children learn.   In his theory, there are no bad parents, just bad behaviors – the behaviors of both parents, family members, friends and divorce professionals. Most of these bad behaviors go unrecognized in daily life, but they help build a Wall of Alienation between a parent and child. By becoming aware and using his tips, we can all help children build a Foundation of Resilience which will last them a lifetime. This is a book for any parent even considering a divorce, and for any professional who wants to truly help parents raise resilient children.

order now

umhcp130

Understanding and Managing High Conflict Personalities In Legal Disputes: 12 Hour DVD Training for Professionals 
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.

Understanding & Managing High Conflict Personalities in Legal Disputes, from High Conflict Institute, is a dynamic 2-day (12-hour) training series for legal professionals involved in legal disputes, including attorneys, judicial officers, mediators, mental health and collaborative professionals. Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq., recognized as a leading authority on High-Conflict Personalities, provides this in-depth training to help professionals identify and manage High-Conflict Personalities.

order now

billeddy

Working With High Conflict Clients: Ethics & Risk Management (CD or DVD)
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.

This 6-hour seminar was presented to over 350 counselors in Pennsylvania, but can be useful for anyone dealing with potentially high conflict clients or helping their clients deal with a high conflict person in their lives. The training includes: five common personality patterns of high-conflict behavior; recent brain research in managing high-conflict clients; how to avoid boundary violations with high-conflict clients; four-step method of working with high-conflict clients; how to manage confidentiality issues and duties to warn others of risks; risks & opportunities of new roles in conflict settings; professional standards of care to avoid malpractice risks; and how to avoid burn-out and negativity while working with high-conflict clients. Home study test provided if you wish to take the home study test for 6 CE credits. Available in DVD and CD Versions.

order now

dealing

Dealing with High Conflict People in Divorce & Co-Parenting (13-session set)

For separating or divorcing parents, and for professionals who want to know more about the most important issues that parents deal with in high-conflict divorce and separation, and co-parenting with a high-conflict parent. In this audio CD series, Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq., President of the High Conflict Institute, discusses 13 of the most important issues that parents deal with in high-conflict divorce, separation and when co-parenting with a high-conflict parent. Based on the “High-Conflict Personality” theory developed by Bill Eddy, they discuss the 5 personality disorders that drive high-conflict people, including Borderline Personality Disorder, Narcissistic Personality Disorder, Paranoid Personality Disorder, Histrionic Personality Disorder, and Antisocial Personality Disorder.

These audio CDs help you understand what’s going on in the High Conflict person’s mind and how to manage the relationship during and after the divorce or separation and as a co-parent. We teach you how to do the opposite of what you’re used to doing and what you “feel” like doing – a must when dealing with a high-conflict person. Financial info (child support & asset division) is included, along with info for grandparents.

This series is for parents, grandparents and other family members and focuses on issues that arise in high-conflict separation, divorce, child custody and co-parenting disputes, and helps you with on-going relationship management with a high-conflict co-parent and with your children.

Topics include:
Session 1 – High Conflict Separation & Divorce Basics
Session 2 – Managing Your Case When You Don’t Have an Attorney
Session 3 – Educating the Court about High-Conflict Personalities
Session 4 – How to Handle False Accusations
Session 5 – How to Help My Child if I Am Concerned or a Court Has Determined that He/She Has Been Abused
Session 6 – Managing Your Relationship with a High-Conflict Co-Parent
Session 7 – Managing Relationships with Your Children During & After a High-Conflict Divorce or Separation
Session 8 – Should I Request a Custody Evaluation?
Session 9 – Types of Custody & Access (Visitation/Parenting Time) Arrangements, and Requesting Supervised Visits
Session 10 – For Grandparents: Having & Managing Relationships with an Adult Child and Grandchildren When the Other Parent is High-Conflict
Session 11 – Preventing Your Child from Developing High-Conflict Behaviors from the Other Parent’s Influence
Session 12 – When to go to Court and When to Handle It Yourself
Session 13 – Best Use of Parent Coordinators, and Educating Parent Coordinators About High-Conflict Personalities

order now

dealing

Dealing with High Conflict People in Divorce (Without Children)

For separating or divorcing couples without children. In this audio CD series, Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq., President of the High Conflict Institute, discusses 4 of the most important issues that divorcing couples deal with in high-conflict divorce or separation. Based on the “High-Conflict Personality” theory developed by Bill Eddy, he discusses the 5 personality disorders that drive high-conflict people, including Borderline Personality Disorder, Narcissistic Personality Disorder, Paranoid Personality Disorder, Histrionic Personality Disorder, and Antisocial Personality Disorder.

These audio CDs help you understand what’s going on in the High Conflict person’s mind and how to manage the relationship during and after the divorce or separation. Learn how to do the opposite of what you’re used to doing and what you “feel” like doing – a must when dealing with a high-conflict person.

Topics include:
Session 1 – High Conflict Separation & Divorce Basics
Session 2 – Managing Your Case When You Don’t Have an Attorney
Session 3 – Educating the Court About High-Conflict Personalities
Session 4 – When to go to Court and When to Handle It Yourself

order now

Workplace Conflict
fault work130

It’s All Your Fault at Work! Managing Narcissists and Other High-Conflict People
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.

Increasingly, high-conflict people—especially narcissists and bullies—are showing up in the workplace. It’s All Your Fault at Work! addresses ways of managing the behavior of high-conflict people (HCPs). Based on author Bill Eddy’s high-conflict personality theory, the book explains how to recognize predictable patterns of behavior and illustrates with over a dozen examples the simple four-step C.A.R.S. method to calm the HCP, analyze options, respond to hostility, and set limits on extreme behavior.

order now

NWW manual130

New Ways for Work Coaching Manual: Personal Skills for Productive Relationships
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq. and L. Georgi DiStefano, LCSW

High-conflict employees are increasing in the workplace. Bullying, harassment, incivility, and threats of violence are a danger to employees and an organization’s reputation, productivity, and ability to avoid court. This manual is designed for use with New Ways for Work: Workbook, for coaching workers in need of remedial interpersonal skills because of job discipline.

order now

NWW workbook130

New Ways for Work Workbook: Personal Skills for Productive Relationships
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq. and L. Georgi DiStefano, LCSW

This workbook by Bill Eddy and L. Georgi DiStefano is designed to be used with the New Ways for Work: Coaching Manual as a remedial method for workers who have the potential to improve workplace behavior, but are in need of improved conflict resolution skills.

order now

proposal130

So, What’s Your Proposal? Shifting High-Conflict People from Blaming to Problem-Solving in 30 Seconds
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.

Blame abounds! People confront us at work, the store, and online. Nerves get on edge. We get stuck blaming others for anything that goes wrong. With high-conflict people increasing in society, a twenty-four-hour news cycle, and social media, we hear constantly about the worst behavior. The temptation is to react and blame. So, What’s Your Proposal? shifts the conversation from the past and blame to the future and problem-solving. It teaches a simple technique that helps the reader stay calm and confident, while keeping the focus on solving problems. The reader will earn respect-many times in just thirty seconds.

order now

BIFF130

BIFF: Quick Responses to High-Conflict People, Their Personal Attacks, Hostile Email and Social Media Meltdowns (Second Edition)
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.

This is Bill Eddy’s new Second Edition of BIFF. It includes an all-new chapter on “Coaching for BIFF Responses”. BIFF helps us communicate in this age of rapid change and instant communication, and in a society with a growing Culture of Blame and Disrespect. Managing your responses to high-conflict emails, texts, letters, and social media meltdowns is imperative.  A BIFF Response can be applied in any communication anywhere – online, social media, in a letter or even in person. It can be used at work, earning you respect and success. It can help you get along with difficult family members, friends, neighbors and others anywhere in your life. BIFF was designed to protect you and your reputation by responding quickly and civilly to people who treat you rudely, while being reasonable in return. BIFF stands for Brief, Informative, Friendly, and Firm. A BIFF response is easy to remember, but hard to do. It takes practice! This book gives over 20 examples of BIFF responses for all areas of life—plus more tips to help you deal with high-conflict people anywhere.

order now

biffresponse

How To Write A BIFF Response (DVD)
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.

Sick and tired of hostile emails? Personal attacks? Social media meltdowns? This 20-minute video teaches a simple, but powerful method of writing responses that are Brief Informative Friendly Firm.   These are called “BIFF Responses” and make YOU look good! It takes practice, but almost anyone can do it. Learn how to write short BIFF responses with this video, including examples for relationships; divorce conflicts; at work as an employess; at work as a manager.

order now

coachbiff130

Coaching For BIFF Responses (DVD)
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.

Coaching for BIFF Responses is a 50-minute video that teaches a 10-question model for coaching anyone to write responses that are Brief, Informative, Friendly and Firm (“BIFF Responses”). High Conflict Institute has taught the BIFF method for over six years and it is changing the conversation in divorce cases, in the workplace, between neighbors and among family members.  This video includes videotape examples of coaching everyday people to use the BIFF method. It’s not as easy as it looks! This training session should help you improve your BIFF skills and your coaching skills. For anyone working with people: lawyers, counselors, teachers, managers, healthcare workers, administrators, government officials – or anyone!

order now

Fault130

It’s All Your Fault! 12 Tips for Managing People Who Blame Others for Everything
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.

Bill's book filled with lots of practical methods for handling High Conflict People (HCPs) in any setting, including neighbor disputes, workplace conflicts, family battles, with strangers, etc.  HCPs target those close to them and people in positions of authority, so in this book Bill focuses on what to do when YOU are the Target of Blame—and how to avoid or prevent being one for long. Bill defines the characteristics of HCP behavior and describes Borderline Personality Disorder, Narcissistic Personality Disorder, Histrionic Personality Disorder and Antisocial Personality Disorder and why they drive people to act the way they do. It is organized around 12 Key Tips (5 Do’s and 7 Don’ts), that simplify large concepts into small, easy-to-remember phrases when you’re under the stress of a high conflict dispute. This book is for the general public, so you can give it to anyone.

order now

hcpworkhr

Managing High Conflict People in the Workplace: For HR, Ombuds, EAP & Other Conflict Managers (CD)
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.

As problem solvers, HR, EAP, Ombudsmen & other conflict managers have to handle a wide range of disputes. High-conflict people usually find their way quickly to these offices. Learn how to deal with high-conflict people in the workplace using the C.A.R.S. method. This session is specifically for Human Resource professionals, Employee Assistance Professionals, Ombudsmen and other conflict managers.

order now

hcpworkmgr

Managing High Conflict People in the Workplace: For Managers and Supervisors (CD)
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.

High-conflict employees and colleagues can wreak havoc in any workplace. They are the most likely people to file lawsuits and complaints against licenses and with the EEOC. Learn how to deal with a High-Conflict employee or colleague using the C.A.R.S. method. This session is specifically for managers and supervisors.

order now

hcpworkemp

Managing High Conflict People in the Workplace: For Employees (CD)
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.

Dealing with a bully or blamer at work, a board of directors, non-profit, or other like places, can be devastating and cause unimaginable stress. Learn how to deal with a high-conflict bully or blamer, including bosses, managers and co-workers using the C.A.R.S. method. This session is for employees.

order now

hcphealth

Managing High Conflict People in Healthcare (CD)
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.

Healthcare is an area ripe for high-conflict disputes because High Conflict People are looking for a Target of Blame; and doctors, nurses, other healthcare professionals, hospitals & clinics are easy targets for high-conflict people. Includes the C.A.R.S. method of conflict resolution. This session is for anyone working in healthcare.

order now

Court
hcp130

High Conflict People in Legal Disputes (2nd Edition)
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.

Using over two dozen compelling case examples, Bill Eddy explains the dynamics and strange logic of four types of Personality Disorders that appear in legal disputes. Everybody knows someone with a High Conflict Personality (HCP). “How can he be so unreasonable? So totally rigid and self-centered?” “Why does she keep fighting so much? Can’t she see how destructive she is?” “Can you believe they’re going to court over ______?” (You fill in the issue).  This book helps make sense of the fears that drive conflict and drive people to file lawsuits, complaints and wreak havoc for legal professionals and the general public alike. Bill Eddy explores the characteristics of Borderline Personality Disorder, Narcissistic Personality Disorder, Histrionic Personality Disorder and Antisocial Personality Disorder. Chart included.

order now

managinghcps130

Managing High Conflict People in Court
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.

This book describes general principles and suggestions for judicial officers to use in managing people with High-Conflict Personalities in any courtroom, with an emphasis on family court litigants. As explained in this informative book, approximately half of these cases appear to involve two or more parties who are HCPs, while the other half may be driven primarily by one HCP with the other party generally acting reasonably. As litigants, they have a familiar pattern of high-intensity emotions, distortions of information, and self-defeating behavior. Their prolonged disputes are characterized by unchanging hostility, replacement of resolved issues with new unresolved issues, and lack of insight and behavior change.

order now

future130

The Future of Family Court: Structure, Skills and Less Stress
By Bill Eddy, LCSW

The Future of Family Court is designed for judicial officers with an emphasis on applying lessons learned from the field of mental health to the family court system, especially when working with parents with personality disorders or traits. Written from Bill Eddy’s perspective as a family lawyer and mental health professional, and as a trainer of judges in managing high-conflict people in court, he provides tips on what individual judges can do, rather than recommending sweeping changes in the court system or creating new players in the decision-making process.  Judges who apply the principles described should feel a much better sense of control over their courtrooms and less stress.

order now

alienate130

Don't Alienate The Kids! Raising Resilient Children While Avoiding High Conflict Divorce
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, JD

Don’t Alienate the Kids! is a fresh examination of the child alienation problem from the perspective of a lawyer, therapist, mediator. Bill doesn’t just analyze the Parental Alienation Syndrome vs. Child Abuse Presumption debate; he also proposes his own theory based on recent breakthroughs in brain research about how children learn.   In his theory, there are no bad parents, just bad behaviors – the behaviors of both parents, family members, friends and divorce professionals. Most of these bad behaviors go unrecognized in daily life, but they help build a Wall of Alienation between a parent and child. By becoming aware and using his tips, we can all help children build a Foundation of Resilience which will last them a lifetime. This is a book for any parent even considering a divorce, and for any professional who wants to truly help parents raise resilient children.

order now

nwlogo130

New Ways For Families Products

Please visit the The New Ways For Families website to view the entire family of books, workbooks, CDs and DVDs available for purchase.

umhcp130

Understanding and Managing High Conflict Personalities In Legal Disputes: 12 Hour DVD Training for Professionals 
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.

Understanding & Managing High Conflict Personalities in Legal Disputes, from High Conflict Institute, is a dynamic 2-day (12-hour) training series for legal professionals involved in legal disputes, including attorneys, judicial officers, mediators, mental health and collaborative professionals. Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq., recognized as a leading authority on High-Conflict Personalities, provides this in-depth training to help professionals identify and manage High-Conflict Personalities.

order now

meddvd

Managing High Conflict People in Mediation (DVD)
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.

High-conflict people appear to be increasing in society and in mediation. They often have intense negative emotions, make repeated personal attacks, trigger splits in communities, organizations and families. They frequently work against their own self-interest and seem to have little apparent desire to resolve the issues at hand. This 2-hour seminar provides information about the predictable patterns of five common types of high-conflict people, including case examples. Ten Tips are provided for mediators to use in managing their disputes, which are respectful, calming of their negative emotions, and focus on tasks and setting limits. Bill Eddy livens this presentation with humor, surprising insights and dozens of practical suggestions for mediators to use in any conflict involving one or more high-conflict people.

order now

Healthcare
BIFF130

BIFF: Quick Responses to High-Conflict People, Their Personal Attacks, Hostile Email and Social Media Meltdowns (Second Edition)
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.

This is Bill Eddy’s new Second Edition of BIFF. It includes an all-new chapter on “Coaching for BIFF Responses”. BIFF helps us communicate in this age of rapid change and instant communication, and in a society with a growing Culture of Blame and Disrespect. Managing your responses to high-conflict emails, texts, letters, and social media meltdowns is imperative.  A BIFF Response can be applied in any communication anywhere – online, social media, in a letter or even in person. It can be used at work, earning you respect and success. It can help you get along with difficult family members, friends, neighbors and others anywhere in your life. BIFF was designed to protect you and your reputation by responding quickly and civilly to people who treat you rudely, while being reasonable in return. BIFF stands for Brief, Informative, Friendly, and Firm. A BIFF response is easy to remember, but hard to do. It takes practice! This book gives over 20 examples of BIFF responses for all areas of life—plus more tips to help you deal with high-conflict people anywhere.

order now

biffresponse

How To Write A BIFF Response (DVD)
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.

Sick and tired of hostile emails? Personal attacks? Social media meltdowns? This 20-minute video teaches a simple, but powerful method of writing responses that are Brief Informative Friendly Firm.   These are called “BIFF Responses” and make YOU look good! It takes practice, but almost anyone can do it. Learn how to write short BIFF responses with this video, including examples for relationships; divorce conflicts; at work as an employess; at work as a manager.

order now

coachbiff130

Coaching For BIFF Responses (DVD)
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.

Coaching for BIFF Responses is a 50-minute video that teaches a 10-question model for coaching anyone to write responses that are Brief, Informative, Friendly and Firm (“BIFF Responses”). High Conflict Institute has taught the BIFF method for over six years and it is changing the conversation in divorce cases, in the workplace, between neighbors and among family members.  This video includes videotape examples of coaching everyday people to use the BIFF method. It’s not as easy as it looks! This training session should help you improve your BIFF skills and your coaching skills. For anyone working with people: lawyers, counselors, teachers, managers, healthcare workers, administrators, government officials – or anyone!

order now

proposal130

So, What’s Your Proposal? Shifting High-Conflict People from Blaming to Problem-Solving in 30 Seconds
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.

Blame abounds! People confront us at work, the store, and online. Nerves get on edge. We get stuck blaming others for anything that goes wrong. With high-conflict people increasing in society, a twenty-four-hour news cycle, and social media, we hear constantly about the worst behavior. The temptation is to react and blame. So, What’s Your Proposal? shifts the conversation from the past and blame to the future and problem-solving. It teaches a simple technique that helps the reader stay calm and confident, while keeping the focus on solving problems. The reader will earn respect-many times in just thirty seconds.

order now

fault work130

It’s All Your Fault at Work! Managing Narcissists and Other High-Conflict People
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.

COMING JANUARY 2015. Taking pre-orders now. Increasingly, high-conflict people—especially narcissists and bullies—are showing up in the workplace. It’s All Your Fault at Work! addresses ways of managing the behavior of high-conflict people (HCPs). Based on author Bill Eddy’s high-conflict personality theory, the book explains how to recognize predictable patterns of behavior and illustrates with over a dozen examples the simple four-step C.A.R.S. method to calm the HCP, analyze options, respond to hostility, and set limits on extreme behavior.

order now

Fault130

It’s All Your Fault! 12 Tips for Managing People Who Blame Others for Everything
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.

Bill's book filled with lots of practical methods for handling High Conflict People (HCPs) in any setting, including neighbor disputes, workplace conflicts, family battles, with strangers, etc.  HCPs target those close to them and people in positions of authority, so in this book Bill focuses on what to do when YOU are the Target of Blame—and how to avoid or prevent being one for long. Bill defines the characteristics of HCP behavior and describes Borderline Personality Disorder, Narcissistic Personality Disorder, Histrionic Personality Disorder and Antisocial Personality Disorder and why they drive people to act the way they do. It is organized around 12 Key Tips (5 Do’s and 7 Don’ts), that simplify large concepts into small, easy-to-remember phrases when you’re under the stress of a high conflict dispute. This book is for the general public, so you can give it to anyone.

order now

hcphealth

Managing High Conflict People in Healthcare (CD)
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.

Healthcare is an area ripe for high-conflict disputes because High Conflict People are looking for a Target of Blame; and doctors, nurses, other healthcare professionals, hospitals & clinics are easy targets for high-conflict people. Includes the C.A.R.S. method of conflict resolution. This session is for anyone working in healthcare.

order now

hcpworkhr

Managing High Conflict People in the Workplace: For HR, Ombuds, EAP & Other Conflict Managers (CD)
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.

As problem solvers, HR, EAP, Ombudsmen & other conflict managers have to handle a wide range of disputes. High-conflict people usually find their way quickly to these offices. Learn how to deal with high-conflict people in the workplace using the C.A.R.S. method. This session is specifically for Human Resource professionals, Employee Assistance Professionals, Ombudsmen and other conflict managers.

order now

hcpworkmgr

Managing High Conflict People in the Workplace: For Managers and Supervisors (CD)
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.

High-conflict employees and colleagues can wreak havoc in any workplace. They are the most likely people to file lawsuits and complaints against licenses and with the EEOC. Learn how to deal with a High-Conflict employee or colleague using the C.A.R.S. method. This session is specifically for managers and supervisors.

order now

hcpworkemp

Managing High Conflict People in the Workplace: For Employees (CD)
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.

Dealing with a bully or blamer at work, a board of directors, non-profit, or other like places, can be devastating and cause unimaginable stress. Learn how to deal with a high-conflict bully or blamer, including bosses, managers and co-workers using the C.A.R.S. method. This session is for employees.

order now

billeddy

Working With High Conflict Clients: Ethics & Risk Management
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.

This 6-hour seminar was presented to over 350 counselors in Pennsylvania, but can be useful for anyone dealing with potentially high conflict clients or helping their clients deal with a high conflict person in their lives. The training includes: five common personality patterns of high-conflict behavior; recent brain research in managing high-conflict clients; how to avoid boundary violations with high-conflict clients; four-step method of working with high-conflict clients; how to manage confidentiality issues and duties to warn others of risks; risks & opportunities of new roles in conflict settings; professional standards of care to avoid malpractice risks; and how to avoid burn-out and negativity while working with high-conflict clients. Home study test provided if you wish to take the home study test for 6 CE credits. Available in DVD and CD Versions.

order now

Education
BIFF130

BIFF: Quick Responses to High-Conflict People, Their Personal Attacks, Hostile Email and Social Media Meltdowns (Second Edition)
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.

This is Bill Eddy’s new Second Edition of BIFF. It includes an all-new chapter on “Coaching for BIFF Responses”. BIFF helps us communicate in this age of rapid change and instant communication, and in a society with a growing Culture of Blame and Disrespect. Managing your responses to high-conflict emails, texts, letters, and social media meltdowns is imperative.  A BIFF Response can be applied in any communication anywhere – online, social media, in a letter or even in person. It can be used at work, earning you respect and success. It can help you get along with difficult family members, friends, neighbors and others anywhere in your life. BIFF was designed to protect you and your reputation by responding quickly and civilly to people who treat you rudely, while being reasonable in return. BIFF stands for Brief, Informative, Friendly, and Firm. A BIFF response is easy to remember, but hard to do. It takes practice! This book gives over 20 examples of BIFF responses for all areas of life—plus more tips to help you deal with high-conflict people anywhere.

order now

biffresponse

How To Write A BIFF Response (DVD)
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.

Sick and tired of hostile emails? Personal attacks? Social media meltdowns? This 20-minute video teaches a simple, but powerful method of writing responses that are Brief Informative Friendly Firm.   These are called “BIFF Responses” and make YOU look good! It takes practice, but almost anyone can do it. Learn how to write short BIFF responses with this video, including examples for relationships; divorce conflicts; at work as an employess; at work as a manager.

order now

coachbiff130

Coaching For BIFF Responses (DVD)
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.

Coaching for BIFF Responses is a 50-minute video that teaches a 10-question model for coaching anyone to write responses that are Brief, Informative, Friendly and Firm (“BIFF Responses”). High Conflict Institute has taught the BIFF method for over six years and it is changing the conversation in divorce cases, in the workplace, between neighbors and among family members.  This video includes videotape examples of coaching everyday people to use the BIFF method. It’s not as easy as it looks! This training session should help you improve your BIFF skills and your coaching skills. For anyone working with people: lawyers, counselors, teachers, managers, healthcare workers, administrators, government officials – or anyone!

order now

proposal130

So, What’s Your Proposal? Shifting High-Conflict People from Blaming to Problem-Solving in 30 Seconds
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.

Blame abounds! People confront us at work, the store, and online. Nerves get on edge. We get stuck blaming others for anything that goes wrong. With high-conflict people increasing in society, a twenty-four-hour news cycle, and social media, we hear constantly about the worst behavior. The temptation is to react and blame. So, What’s Your Proposal? shifts the conversation from the past and blame to the future and problem-solving. It teaches a simple technique that helps the reader stay calm and confident, while keeping the focus on solving problems. The reader will earn respect-many times in just thirty seconds.

order now

fault work130

It’s All Your Fault at Work! Managing Narcissists and Other High-Conflict People
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.

Increasingly, high-conflict people—especially narcissists and bullies—are showing up in the workplace. It’s All Your Fault at Work! addresses ways of managing the behavior of high-conflict people (HCPs). Based on author Bill Eddy’s high-conflict personality theory, the book explains how to recognize predictable patterns of behavior and illustrates with over a dozen examples the simple four-step C.A.R.S. method to calm the HCP, analyze options, respond to hostility, and set limits on extreme behavior.

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It’s All Your Fault! 12 Tips for Managing People Who Blame Others for Everything
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.

Bill's book filled with lots of practical methods for handling High Conflict People (HCPs) in any setting, including neighbor disputes, workplace conflicts, family battles, with strangers, etc.  HCPs target those close to them and people in positions of authority, so in this book Bill focuses on what to do when YOU are the Target of Blame—and how to avoid or prevent being one for long. Bill defines the characteristics of HCP behavior and describes Borderline Personality Disorder, Narcissistic Personality Disorder, Histrionic Personality Disorder and Antisocial Personality Disorder and why they drive people to act the way they do. It is organized around 12 Key Tips (5 Do’s and 7 Don’ts), that simplify large concepts into small, easy-to-remember phrases when you’re under the stress of a high conflict dispute. This book is for the general public, so you can give it to anyone.

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Managing High Conflict People in Higher Education (CD)
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.

Students & parents alike are presenting universities & colleges with a new set of problems. The demands & conflict situations confronting staff, faculty, and administrators require new skills and awareness to address high-conflict people. Includes the C.A.R.S. method of conflict resolution developed by leading expert, Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq., co-founder and President of High Conflict Institute.

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Managing High Conflict People in the Workplace: For HR, Ombuds, EAP & Other Conflict Managers (CD)
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.

As problem solvers, HR, EAP, Ombudsmen & other conflict managers have to handle a wide range of disputes. High-conflict people usually find their way quickly to these offices. Learn how to deal with high-conflict people in the workplace using the C.A.R.S. method. This session is specifically for Human Resource professionals, Employee Assistance Professionals, Ombudsmen and other conflict managers.

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Managing High Conflict People in the Workplace: For Managers and Supervisors (CD)
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.

High-conflict employees and colleagues can wreak havoc in any workplace. They are the most likely people to file lawsuits and complaints against licenses and with the EEOC. Learn how to deal with a High-Conflict employee or colleague using the C.A.R.S. method. This session is specifically for managers and supervisors.

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Managing High Conflict People in the Workplace: For Employees (CD)
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.

Dealing with a bully or blamer at work, a board of directors, non-profit, or other like places, can be devastating and cause unimaginable stress. Learn how to deal with a high-conflict bully or blamer, including bosses, managers and co-workers using the C.A.R.S. method. This session is for employees.

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Politics
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Trump Bubbles: The Dramatic Rise and Fall of High-Conflict Politicians
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.

Trump Bubbles is the first book to really explain the rise and fall of Donald Trump, candidate for President of the United States of America. What’s a trump bubble? It’s when emotions trump thinking in politics. When fear trumps facts. When leader love trumps logic. Donald Trump is the most recent trump bubble, but trump bubbles have occurred before and will again.

Remember the dot.com bust of 2000? The housing and stock market bubbles that burst in 2008? They were held up by “irrational exuberance." Now there’s the Donald Trump Bubble. People love him or hate him or are totally confused. However, he is quite predictable, if you understand high-conflict personalities. Trump Bubbles explains the rise-and-fall pattern of high-conflict politicians, focusing on the case of Donald Trump and the questions people ask:

• Why do people compare him to Adolf Hitler in the 1920’s?
• Why do people defend him despite his outrageous statements and beliefs?
• Will he become reasonable if he ever becomes President?
• Does he have narcissistic personality disorder?
• Will he settle on a set of policies, or will he keep changing impulsively?
• Could he be a good thing for American politics?
• Would he start World War III?
• How do you stop trump bubbles once they start?
• What happens when a trump bubble bursts?

To answer these questions, the author relies on social science, psychology and history, as well as his years of training professionals in dealing with high-conflict personalities and situations. It’s a beautiful thing!

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SPLITTING AMERICA: How Politicians, Super PACs and the News Media Mirror High Conflict Divorce
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq. and Donald T. Saposnek, Ph.D.

Splitting America is a warning to voters and politicians that current polarization risks long-term harm to our nation. This book compares the same 5 traits of high-conflict divorces to today's politics. The High-Conflict Politician Score Card is included! The authors note that the kind of negative behavior we are seeing in politics increases conflict rather than reducing or resolving it.  The authors hope their book will help change the destructive direction in which our country seems to be headed. They want us to avoid the "nasty divorce" that would hurt our nation and strive instead to seek common ground and understanding.

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BIFF: Quick Responses to High-Conflict People, Their Personal Attacks, Hostile Email and Social Media Meltdowns (Second Edition)
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.

This is Bill Eddy’s new Second Edition of BIFF. It includes an all-new chapter on “Coaching for BIFF Responses”. BIFF helps us communicate in this age of rapid change and instant communication, and in a society with a growing Culture of Blame and Disrespect. Managing your responses to high-conflict emails, texts, letters, and social media meltdowns is imperative.  A BIFF Response can be applied in any communication anywhere – online, social media, in a letter or even in person. It can be used at work, earning you respect and success. It can help you get along with difficult family members, friends, neighbors and others anywhere in your life. BIFF was designed to protect you and your reputation by responding quickly and civilly to people who treat you rudely, while being reasonable in return. BIFF stands for Brief, Informative, Friendly, and Firm.   A BIFF response is easy to remember, but hard to do. It takes practice! This little book gives over 20 examples of BIFF responses for all areas of life—plus additional tips to help you deal with high-conflict people anywhere.

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How To Write A BIFF Response (DVD)
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.

Sick and tired of hostile emails? Personal attacks? Social media meltdowns? This 20-minute video teaches a simple, but powerful method of writing responses that are Brief Informative Friendly Firm.   These are called “BIFF Responses” and make YOU look good! It takes practice, but almost anyone can do it. Learn how to write short BIFF responses with this video, including examples for relationships; divorce conflicts; at work as an employess; at work as a manager.

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Coaching For BIFF Responses (DVD)
By Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.

Coaching for BIFF Responses is a 50-minute video that teaches a 10-question model for coaching anyone to write responses that are Brief, Informative, Friendly and Firm (“BIFF Responses”). High Conflict Institute has taught the BIFF method for over six years and it is changing the conversation in divorce cases, in the workplace, between neighbors and among family members.  This video includes videotape examples of coaching everyday people to use the BIFF method. It’s not as easy as it looks! This training session should help you improve your BIFF skills and your coaching skills. For anyone working with people: lawyers, counselors, teachers, managers, healthcare workers, administrators, government officials – or anyone!

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More Bill Eddy Books, DVDs and Audio CDs

Managing High Conflict People in Law Enforcement & Code Enforcement

Managing High Conflict People in Neighbor Disputes

For a full listing of Books, CDs and DVDs available featuring Bill Eddy, please visit UnHooked Books.

Other Websites From the High Conflict Institute:

New Ways for Families

BIFF Response

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